Trying and Letting Go (#SmallWonder Link-Up)

(#SmallWonder friends, this post is late!  My apologies.  We will be taking a break from linking up next Monday (12/28) and I'll see you back here again January 4th.)

I tried to make Christmas cookies twice this December. 

The first was a batch of chocolate covered peanut butter balls.  I mixed the no-bake batter quickly before the buses brought the older kids home, then I shaped them into balls while all four watched TV.  Lining a tray with parchment paper, I put them in the refrigerator to chill, thinking we would roll them in chocolate after dinner.

Then my oldest son threw up. 

The next day he stayed home sick and by the third day the moment had passed.  The peanut butter balls sat naked in the refrigerator, stale and shrunken.  “Just eat them,” I said, at last.

Yesterday, a week after my initial attempt, I mixed two batches of cookie dough – classic cut-out sugar cookies and Martha Stewart’s chocolate peppermint cookies.  I put them, covered, in the refrigerator to chill. 

And then, yes, my older son threw up again. 

Baking cookies lost its appeal and I pulled the last bags of Thanksgiving’s turkey-barley soup out of the freezer to thaw for dinner.  Today he’s home sick again and I completed my first “professional” interview in years over the phone while he sat watching TV.  The call was dropped once and a visitor came to the door mid-conversation.  This afternoon we’ll head to the pediatrician’s office, again.


Last week I met with my Spiritual Director.  She told me, in the nicest way possible, that I’m not the center of the universe.  Also, when I complained about not being able to do. it. all., she asked me, “What is most important to you during this season?” 

“Attending to the mystery,” I said, “staying alert for all the ways Christ creeps in among us.”

Of course, that means I might need to let go of some other things. 

Like baking cookies. 

What do you need to let go of this week?  What's most important for you to hold onto in the midst of the holiday rush?  

*   *   *

Welcome to the #SmallWonder link-up.

What if we chose to deliberately look for the small moments of wonder, the small sparks of presence, of delight or sorrow, of true humanity in which we meet God? 

That's my proposal - that we gather here each week to share one moment of Wonder from each of our days.  

You're invited to link-up a brief post about a small moment of wonder.  Don't worry if your post is too long, too short, or not just right - you're welcome to come as you are.  

While you're here, please do take a look around and encourage at least one other blogger with a comment.  


  1. Transported back to the year that all four boys got sick. No baking. Not much of anything happened that December, and, as I was taking down the decorations, I realized with horror that I had left the same festive Christmas hand towel hanging on the handle of the oven for the entire month. Yuck. Praying that you will find time in the quiet(?) of a season of sickness to enter into the peace and joy of Jesus.

    1. Oh Michelle, you don't want to know how long it's been since I mopped . . . but Christ will come anyway, won't he? Thanks for sharing. And for being part of this small community.

  2. So sorry for the sickness in the house. :( Praying all will be well as the week goes along!

    This advice is good for all of us to hear: "She told me, in the nicest way possible, that I’m not the center of the universe." And especially when it's said in the nicest way possible. Love this. Thanks, Kelly. Merry Christmas!

  3. I always enjoy coming to your home because there is a peace there among the kaoss. You are doing a fantastic job.

  4. There's such a tension in the 'want-to's of this season and being an engaged, perfect, Hallmark moment mom....and the 'shoulds' we heap on ourselves.
    I think the hardest lesson to learn is that taking our kids to the pediatrician's office and answering the door might be the mystery where God wants to meet us.
    I bristle at the dailiness of life...but that is where God tries me and bends me and says, "I am here first. In the people right in front of you. And the beds and the laundry..." and well, sometimes I add too much.
    I can relate, my friend.

  5. the wonder today is that stating and restating an intention and saying my blessing words mysteriously resulted in my resentment and fear of a social event dying away and being replaced by friendly interactions and a good time with my husband. Resulted is too exact a word; I felt the shift inside, was surprised, and then connected it backward to the intention and the blessing words.

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  7. Oh Kelly. I'm so sorry. It brought back memories of when my youngest was 14 months old and got a terrible stomach virus. We (because I went with him) were both hospitalized because he became so dehydrated. I'll never forget getting a phone call from my other son who was about 4 1/2, and crying because he was now throwing up and I couldn't come home! We were finally released on December 23rd at 7:30 PM. I told my husband that we were coming home, but not to tell my other son, and let him answer the door. Well, when he saw his mommy and younger brother at the door, he was SO excited!! I think that was the year that I realized that there is no greater gift at Christmas than the love of family.

    Except for the love of a baby who came in such a humble way to cure the sickness of sin...

    Merry Christmas to you and yours, and may God bring healing!!